How to respond to a personal attack during an argument.
How to respond to a personal attack during an argument.
Hello, my name is Chris Kamp and I am an academically trained apologist and I teach logic and critical thinking for a living.
When someone resorts to a personal attack instead of addressing your argument, they are guilty of committing the logical fallacy called the Ad Hominem fallacy—Ad Hominem is Latin for “to the person.” Its name is fitting as what the fallacy does is shift the focus from your argument to you—that is shift from the argument to the person.
Here is how to respond:
Calmly and unaffectedly say: “that may be true, but even if it is, it does not affect the truth of my argument.”
In other words, you are saying to them: the truth of my position is separate from any insults that you can conjure up about me. Instead of wasting your time looking for my flaws, you should be attempting to find flaws in my argument.
By saying, “that may be true, but even if it is, it does not affect the truth of my argument.”
It blocks their attempt to take control of the discussion and denies them the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of you or getting you off topic. And, more importantly, you keep control of your argument and prevent them from derailing the important and worthwhile discussion you want to have.
However, depending on the nature of the personal attack, you may need to establish a clear boundary.
If their insult crosses a line for you. Say, “I am willing to rationally discuss this topic, but I will not respond to personal attacks.”
Then, unapologetically stick to your boundary. This sets the terms for which you are willing to continue the conversation. If they are unwilling to respect your boundary, then they do not get access to your thoughts.
To sum up, here is how to respond to a personal attack in an argument:
Say, “that may be true, but even it is, it does not affect the truth of my argument,” or if their personal attack crosses the line, say instead “I am willing to rationally discuss this topic, but I will not respond to personal attacks.” And then, stick to your boundary.
It is worth noting here, that this tip works in the comment section as well, not just in face-to-face conversation. Often people are even more prone to personal attacks on social media because the physical distance makes it seem easier to detach themselves from the consequences of their words. Also, these responses do not need to be utilized verbatim. Feel free to reword them to fit both your voice and the context of the conversation.
So, the next time someone attacks you personally instead of your argument try that and if it helps, share this to help others. Let’s argue better, fight less, and have the truth be the winner of our next argument.